I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
I gave myself a charlie horse masturbating this morning. I feel like that really set the tone for the day.
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
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