I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've seriously contemplated telling him the baby isn't his just so I can meet Maury Povich
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
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