Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
News Flash: Turtles are cuter than Jesus.
Congrats on damning at least 10 generations of your offspring to hell with just one text message. Way to start your morning off right.
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
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