Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
I wish drunk me wasn't so into manscaping. Or at least good at it. Either or really
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
I was sleeping pretty good until your cat pooped loudly. I dreamed that a full grown man was pooping on my ear. It startled me.
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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