I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
Note to all middle aged "I totally let myself go after childbirth" frumpy mothers: I do not dress this way for your husbands. Stop looking at me like that. It's not my fault.
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
You told the waitress last night "What tip bracket do I have to be in to see your boobs"
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
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