is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude.
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
You would seriously think I would remember who put themselves in my phone as Burt Rynalds Moustache, but I don't. And I need to be reminded of who you are so I can give you a proper high five.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
Randomize