Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
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