The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
My girlfriend and my fuck buddy both started their periods this weekend. The good news is, neither of them are pregnant. The bad news is, I'll have to find someone else to fuck til next weekend. No wait.....that's good news too.
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whenever you feel bad about your life, just remember the time I tried to swim while high and thought for a minute I was genuinely drowning
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
Can you bring me the toilet please
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
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