On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
you missed an awesome concert last night. some middle aged woman that was grinding on me kept trying to stick her hand down my pants. i ended up rewarding her tenacity by letting her hold onto it for a song, i think it made her night.
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
Randomize
