Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
doctor said mango vodka does not count as my daily servings of fruit. damn.
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
they call him Oral-B. enough said
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
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