I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
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