You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
if i get the "i'm engaged" text one more time, i'm going to shoot myself in the face so my cats won't eat it when i die alone.
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
Listen, don't freak out when you walk out on me masturbating in front of my roommate. No homo. He just needs to be put to his place.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
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