When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
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