So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
Why am I always the sober one?
Cause you're the only one with any sort of self control. It's kinda your super power...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I really want to text him and congratulate him on having a bigger penis than the guy I dumped him for, but I thought that might be awkward...
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
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