dude I went to cubs game with my mustache, aviators, and a hooded sweatshirt. Do you think it was irony or fate that there were four 17 year old girls in front of us?
This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
Damn victory sex feels great
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
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