You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
He asked to "fluff my boner.."
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
found a better reason to procrastinate than the usual sunday-don't-give-no-fucks. literally every one of my textbooks is soaked in captain. can't turn a page without gagging.
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
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