dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
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