U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
Seriously. My exes act like they own shares of my vagina.
Well, in their defense, they have invested a lot of time and money
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
I wear drunk well.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
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