I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
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