I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude.
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
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