whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
OMG the post office opened my dildo! "we sincerely regret the damage to your package"
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also there's so much vodka on my breath that if I blew on my fingers my nail polish would fall right off
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
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