Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
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FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
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how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
Are those your contacts stuck to the mirror?!
Yeah. Drunk me tried to put my contacts on the mirror where my eyes were.
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
So apparently I fell asleep sitting on the toilet last night while my drunk girlfriend sang to me.
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