I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
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