he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
Randomize