Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
You tried to call the hospital and left a voicemail asking if you could be put on the liver transplant list as a "pre-caution"
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
it's like heaven, but drunker
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
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