Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
"Don't get as drunk as I was on my birthday" has been upgraded from a goal for Friday night to a goal for my life in general.
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
Jesus fucking Mary Christ if I have to clean shit out of my fucking bathtub one more fucking time I'm gonna murder a fucking kitten
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