I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
He told me his condom was going to expire tomorrow and he needed to use it. I can't believe I fell for it.
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
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