Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
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