something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record.
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
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I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
Sometimes I feel like I should become a beautician purely for my ability to shave pretty shapes into my pubic hair.
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
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