Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
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Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
I knew you were super hungover. But so hungover you fire our house cleaner because her vacuums too loud is excessive
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Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
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