as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
The shit I just took was my body's way of telling me bourbon and mixed nuts aren't an appropriate dinner. Well played, colon. WELL. PLAYED.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your children are clinging to me like my teets are full of bountiful milkiness. They're driving me nuts. I felt my uterus shrivel up.
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
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