i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
I'm sorry I missed your birthday brunch. If it makes you feel any better I woke up wearing someone else's toga and a sombrero
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