Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
Randomize