used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
Please don't give away my fajitas
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
Randomize