I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
i just woke up to seventeen texts from you saying all the things you would have done for a french fry.
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I only know two things that kitchen floors are good for... sex and quesadillas that got dropped. You know, the five second rule
I'm texting you the word "cockring" because I feel it hasn't been said enough throughout our friendship.
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
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