yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
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