Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
Update from family reunion: my aunt Janet once got her legs stuck behind her head. The fire department had to be called.
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
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