Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
I just had a dude tell me how he got fired from friendly's for tripping a kid and followed the story with "If i'm gonna do it, I do it big."
I saved $70 from being to drunk to go out last night so I figured I could buy a new watch.
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
If you're not going to call the girls I bring around by name, at least don't call them by number. It's been cockblocking since girl #47. Dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
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