the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
After tacos, we're chasing women.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
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