Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i woke up on my kitchen floor, halfway through a text, and my mascara running... this is why i stopped drinking tequila
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
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