his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
I'm officially "accidentally set myself on fire" drunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
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