**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
i need a shirt that says "I fuck trainwrecks"
I recorded his drunk dial calls. My personal favorite was the one that began, "grab the bull by the horns and fuck his cock."
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So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
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I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
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