I like to think it a success when the cops are called
I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
I met this girl the other day and found out her boyfriend is a helicopter pilot. How the fuck do you compete with that.
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
He told his wife he was too old to pretend to be straight. She tried to argue. He walked two tables over and was like this is my highschool sweetheart and he's an excellent fuck, we're running away together. It was epic.
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