just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
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