she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
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