oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
every time i drive by the road she lives on, i scream in the car "i'm sorry i'm sleeping with your boyfriend!" makes me feel less whore-y.
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just did a drunk experiment to find out what it looks like when you turn a burner on the stove on while wearing night-vision goggles. I may be blind in my right eye now.
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
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