I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
I was so drunk I accidentally put in two tampons.
I tried to talk you out of it. You were worried about alcohol being a blood thinner.
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The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
You came out of the bathroom, said "I'M DRUNK BUT I REMEMBERED TO WASH MY HANDS!" and then insisted that she smell them.
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
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Did I mention I should never take 5 Xanax and drink?
I sort of figured that out when I found you sitting on the roof of your house saying we could get in through the skylight while I called the locksmith.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
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