Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
I feel like death gave me a hand job
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
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