i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
I'm not saying i'm drunk
But i'm drunk.
Randomize