Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
Dear Douchebag, I would just like to formally issue this fuck you. You will be receiving a letter in the mail soon. With all of your stuff.
Randomize