That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
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